Chapter 1

I would like to thank Sid for the editing and grammar check. Thanks Sid. Also check out his Story Arkansas Vacation. It can be found in the AY section.

Running through the woods it was all I thought about. I had to get away. I couldn't stand to see their faces in my mind. The hurt and pain I put them through I couldn't bare it.

I'm Brian McCalister and I'm 14 years old turning 15 in one month. I am a freshman at St. Leo's High School. I'm only 5'6 and weigh about 147lbs. I have brownish-blonde hair and blue eyes.

I'm running because when I came home I saw my mom and dad sitting there with some gay material from my room. The hurt and the pain I saw I couldn't stand, so I ran. I heard my dad calling after me but I didn't stop, I fell and cut open my leg, I felt branches, and thorns hitting and cutting my face, arms and body but still I didn't stop. I couldn't. I was too afraid.

They probably wanted to throw me out but I beat them to it, I left. Whether I did the right thing or not I don't know, I just had to run and run fast.

It's about 35 degrees right now and darkness isn't far off, but right then and there I didn't care, all I cared about was not seeing the pain and hurt I have caused my family.

You see two years ago I figured out I was gay. All of my friends started looking at the girls and talking about how hot they were, I pretended to notice them to and talk about them as well, in reality I didn't care about them at all. I only thought about my friends and what they looked like naked, and holding them close to me, or better yet having them hold me.

While on the computer one night I stumbled across the nifty archives and started reading stories like Chris and Nigel, Simons Story, Julio, Starting Over, For The Love Of Pete, and so many more. I actually started printing some of them out. I thought I hid them so well, I guess I didn't.

I didn't care about the sex in the stories not that I didn't get off on some of them, but I was looking more for the love and romance, like in the story New Life.

My best friend Scott Davis noticed a few things different about me and even went as far as asking but I always told him it was nothing just being bored or something at the time, I think he bought it but I'm not sure.

Once Scott and I even jacked off together that was cool, but after that he started talking about Jennifer and Sarah two of the hottest girls at the school. I agreed with him that they were hot. Sure, I mean I can look and tell if a girl is hot or pretty or whatever, they just don't do anything for me. While he was talking about them I was thinking about him.

I wasn't in love with him like some of the stories where best friends fell in love, I just thought he looked hot and wished we could have messed around, but even I knew that would not have been cool.

Now Chris Daniels is another story, him I fell in love with. I have been in love with him for like 2 years now but I don't think he even notices me. Every now and then I'll stare at him but he doesn't even notice, so I know I have nothing to worry about.

Chris is beautiful where Scott is about 5'9, 175lbs, with brown hair and brown eyes, Chris is so different he is like 5'10 ½, maybe 170lbs, lean swimmers body, with light blonde almost white hair and dark green emerald eyes.

Scott and I have lived here our whole lives in this small ass town in northern Georgia, but not Chris, he moved here our beginning year of 6th grade and has been here since.

Scott and Chris play on the baseball team together and they seem to be pretty good friends, but as for me whenever Chris comes over I either leave or don't show up I'm too scared he will find out how I feel about him.

All of this was going through my head as I ran, I know I was bleeding and hurt but still I didn't care, I was to scared to stop so I just kept on running.

It must have been about 8 when I stopped, I couldn't hear anyone behind. It was dark and must have been about 30 degrees now or lower so I stopped for a moment and noticed a log. I went and sat down and just cried. Cried for my mom and dad and the rest of my family like Wil my older brother and Jessica my older sister, I was the baby.

Wil was 18 with brown hair and blue eyes like our dad, he's 6'2 and about 210lbs and all muscle. He's in his first year of college; he was going to Mercer University and came home on the weekends.

Wil is a major jock, anything sports and he will get involved. He used to pick on me because I was more into reading and writing and the computer then doing sports. My parents made him stop it, but every now and then he makes a comment about me being so small and such. I don't think he realized how bad he hurts me when he says those things or maybe he just doesn't care.

Jessica looks more like my mom, she just turned 17 about 5'9, 135lbs, with blonde hair and blue eyes. I'm the only one who looks like both my parents. She is a senior at the high school and is ok.

She has a tendency to act stuck up once in a while and sometimes even talks down to me, like she is better then me. She even says I'm a little sissy because I don't like sports, but she only does that when mom and dad aren't around. She is a cheerleader and a damn good one. So it seems I'm the odd man out.

I don't know how long I sat there thinking about them but I soon noticed it was getting colder and starting to snow, I put my arms inside my jacket, shirt and sweater and wrapped them around me making sure that my shirt and sweater were tucked in tight.

I was starting to get really cold with the snow and all, between the sweat that was running down my body now and the cold air I started shivering, but I didn't dare try and return home. I was too scared I would be beat up or something. No my parents never have hit us other then the occasional spanking when we were younger, but for this I'm sure I would have been hurt worse.

I was getting tired but knew I should stay awake and moving. I tried but I couldn't do it, slowly my eyes closed and I drifted off to sleep and strangely I noticed that I didn't feel anything.

When I got the call from Scott that Brian ran off upset into the woods I didn't know what to think other then why, but Scott didn't know anything. All he said was that Brian came home and saw his folks sitting there with some personal things of his on the coffee table and took off running.

They tried to catch him but he ran into the woods, by the time his dad came to the edge of the woods he couldn't be seen or heard, so they came home and started calling his friends, as of now that was about 8 or 9 hours ago we have been searching every since.

We had to call it off by midnight because it was snowing and getting way to cold, all I could do was hope and pray that he would be all right.

I came home and my parents asked if we had any luck and I said no. My mom put a candle in the window.

"Just in case he comes this way he may think to come here and at least get out of the cold." She said. My mom and dad are cool like that. I came out last year at 14 and told them I was gay and if they couldn't handle that then to let me know now and I'll find some place else to live...

At first my mom cried and my dad sat there looking shocked, so I went to my room and started packing my things, I was crying some but I wouldn't let them see me cry. I was just zipping up my suitcase when they both came into my room. My dad unzipped my suitcase and started putting things back up.

"We don't care, as long as you are happy and safe. We won't try and pretend we understand about this, but you are our son and we love you. If your brother and sisters can't handle that then tough, they will just have to get over it. We love you Chris and we just want you to be happy ok?" my dad said coming over to me and giving me a hug. My mom was already holding me and telling me how much she loves me.

Chad my big brother came in about then.

"Hey what's going on?" he asked seeing us all in tears. My dad looked at me and I nodded putting my head on his shoulder.

"Son your brother just told us something that made him think that we would not want him. He packed up his stuff and was getting ready to leave when your mother and I came in here and unpacked it all. Chad your brother is gay, I know you are 17 and this is your last year in high school, if you have a problem with that then just think that this is the last year you will have to deal with it.

You will not treat your brother any differently." About that time Michelle my twin and Jamie the youngest came to the doorway. "You two I just told Chad that Brian just came out to us and if you have any problems with that then as for you two get over it. Chad if you want I can find other living arrangements for you. You're basically an adult now I can deal with you leaving, but not Brian. Michelle, Jamie you are both to young to leave so you will just have to deal with it." He said. I was crying now with all of what my dad had said to them for me. I just hugged my dad and loved him more.

"Also girls I will NOT have either one of you making snide or rude comments about your brothers sexuality. I will also not have you be rude to him or his friends, I am pretty sure he is single and no one knows about this and we will keep it that way until he decides other wise. If I find out that either one of you have said anything to anyone you WILL be grounded till the end of the school year and then I will decide about the summer. Understand me?" she asked. I just smiled and hugged her too while I was crying.

My brother and sisters stood speechless.

"Hey I don't have a problem with it. Just don't stare to long dude, besides I know a few people who are gay and don't want anyone to know. I'm old enough and smart enough to understand the problems you'll have. No problems coming from me. Come here." Chad said giving me a hug. Michelle just kinda looked then walked away, while Jamie just stood staring at me.

"I really don't care if he likes girls or boys as long as he doesn't try and steal one of my boyfriends." Jamie said giving me a hug.

"I won't I promise." I said returning her hug. Michelle was the only one who I was hoping on to stand beside me more then anyone else. I told everyone I wanted to talk to Michelle and they understood. I went to her room and knocked on her door.

"What?" was all she said.

"Ummm it's me can I come in?" I asked not really knowing what I was going to say.

"I guess." I opened the door and walked in shutting it behind me. Michelle was on the bed with a pillow in her lap looking down at it.

"Hey" I said.

"Hey" she responded. Great I thought.

"What's wrong Michelle?" I asked sitting on the end of her bed facing her. "Come on talk to me we tell each other everything." She looked at me.

"I thought we did too, but you didn't tell me about this. I don't care that your gay I'm just more angry that you didn't tell me already." She said getting upset. "Like you said we tell each other everything but you didn't even tell me this."

"I'm sorry I was too worried and scared that you would've hated me. Come on Michelle, this isn't exactly an easy thing to go and tell someone." I said pleading with her. She just stared at me.

"I know and I'm sorry but it still hurts ok." She said tearing up again. I hugged her.

"Well I can tell you something that I haven't told anyone else yet and I may not either." I said. She looked at me waiting. "I can tell you who I have a crush on." I said smiling at her. She beamed at me.

"Who"

"Well you know that short boy the one our age with the brownish-blonde hair. His name is Brian McCalister." I said smiling at her. She looked surprised and happy at the same time.

"Him? Oh My God I can't believe it. Wow, he is so cute." She said giggling and smiling.

"Yeah I know." With that we sat and talked for ages about him.

...Over the last year I noticed him staring at me, he just didn't think I did but I really did. Hell I even looked at him when he didn't know it.

Well now we are here, how I came out and what happened, now all we have to do is find Brian and make sure he is ok.

I was still worried about him and that night I dreamed about him, finding him dead in the woods; I woke up in a cold sweat and noticed Michelle asleep in the chair in my room. I got up and went over to her and shook her arm.

"Hey wake up. What are you doing here?" I asked her.

She yawned and looked up at me. "Thought maybe you could use a friend, with Brian out there and all. Are you ok?" she responded getting up and putting her arm around me. At that point I started crying.

"I don't know I'm so worried about him. I don't know what to do or where to go. I think I'm going to go deep into the woods and look for him. It's about 6 now." I said. I got up off my bed we were sitting on and grabbed some jeans and put them on over my long johns. I grabbed a heavy sweater and my jacket and hiking boots from my closet and finished getting dressed. "Do me a favor and tell mom and dad I went out to look again for him ok?" I said looking at her.

"Ok good luck, love you bro." She said, hugging me and giving me a kiss on the cheek. "Be careful" with that I left.

I started walking towards the part of the woods that I was told that Brian entered. When I got there I noticed there were already some people there. Mr. McCalister, Scott, Wil and even my brother Chad. They turned around when they heard me. Chad came up and gave me a hug.

"Hey why didn't anyone call me to let me know ya'll were going back in this morning?" I asked excepting a cup of hot coco from Mrs. McCalister. I didn't even see her at first.

"You helped out till nearly midnight when we all stopped at 10. We thought you would want to rest." Mr. McCalister said. I just smiled at him.

"That's ok I feel I need to help him." I said and looked away. Scott stared at me kinda funny but didn't say anything Chad looked and smiled.

"Well lets get going, everyone go ten paces from the person next to you and lets go in." Mr. McCalister said.

I don't know how long we walked I know it must have been over 3 hours because the light from the sun coming from the clouds above was getting kinda bright.

As I walked I remembered that there was a log about another 5 minutes from here and decided to rest when I got there.

As I approached I noticed something lying in front of the log, at first I thought it was an animal and stopped, but when nothing happened from the sounds I was making I walked a little more closer, soon I noticed it was a person and from the look of the jacket it was Brian.

I ran up to him and noticed him lying there with his arms inside his cloths. His lips were blue and he was so cold he was almost too cold to touch.

"I found him, I found him." I started hollering. I held him close to me to try and get some warmth going but nothing seemed to be helping. I heard footsteps and soon everyone was there.

"He has hypothermia we have to get him to the hospital right now." Said Mr. McCalister. I was till crying and just held on to his head as Mr. McCalister, Chad and Wil picked him up and started walking back the same way we came with Scott following behind us.

I found him and I was glad for that, I just pray we were in time.